Oh hello well hi there yes you yupp you , remember this one ? 

I mean this song The One That Got Away , so I've been thinking about it lately and you know what I wanna tell you that -------> Congratulations and a big round of applause for making me believed in you TWICE . All I wanna say is that I'm not Katy Perry and obviously I'm not N and with my outmost confidence tonight I'm proud to say that "In another life , I would NOT make you stay cause I really hope I wont have a chance to meet you nor to be glad to know you . Seriously I hope we dont ever ever met each other so that I dont have to say you were the one that got away " Pinky please read this with a big grin on my face , I'll be alright just not tonight but someday . Toodles and Cheers to our new life ahead :)))))) 

xoxo ,

the new M

Recently to be honest I kept thinking about us , about what happened last time . Sometimes I just wish I knew what went wrong between us I really do , sometimes I just hope I realize which part of me that change so much until you act this way . Most of the time I really I hope I can be inside your soul , seeing myself through your eyes and understand what's your heart desire . I always wonder what thoughts that you secretly keep by yourself and what is your feeling towards me ? Is it love or hatred ? The truth may hurt me a lot whatever it is in your mind but having the chance to know what do you really think of me is everything I would gave up just to know . 

My friends are the closest people next to me beside my family , you guys are the second most important thing in my life and Knowing that all our silly moments together , all the laughter that we shared together all those joy is a pure lie it would kill me inside and out . You may not know this cause I always keep it to myself everytime you hurt me bit by bits I always said to myself  "you're my bestfriend whatever happens whatever it is you always will be" :'/ And now I seemed to doubt it are we still the bestfriends we used to be ? Pulling your face whenever I tried to talk to you or when I am always your second or last option , proved me that you hated me all this while and I'm just too dumb not to notice that or so much in love that I didnt care about it as long as you're there . 

Just so you know I tried everything to make you smile the way you did to others , to make you feel happy when we both were left alone and not feeling awkward towards each other but yeah I admit I just dont want you to hate me or me losing you I guess the memories of us being friends is just too strong to hold on . But now if you think that letting go of our friendship is the only option you could think of then on my behalf with all due respect , I Siti Mariam Ibrahim clearly and officially shutting myself off from your perfect life . I'm sorry I wasnt enough nor a good friend to you all this time if you want me in your life with a sincere hoping feeling do change please cause I'm just tired . Have fun bestie 

Dont even say hey or whats up cause I dont wanna know how you're doing and especially dont even call me pretty please with cherries and sprinkles on top . Terima kasih , semoga anda berbahagia bersama N :) 

xoxo , 

M the last goodbye

Hey Assalamualaikum :') So this one is dedicated to my bestest old friend since primary school I love you okay so I hate to see you cry because I feel like I'm the worst bestfriend ever to stand there and watch you in pain . I felt hopeless when I saw you cried the other day for some lame jackass who doesnt even appreciate you . He's just too blind to see that you're too worth it and please dont ever cry for him again you need to be strong kay promise me this . Find someone who will treat you with utter respect , someone who will honor your morals and someone who will make you smile when you're at your lowest . Ditch his sorry what  makes he think that you'll ever forgive him . He made you cried remember ? He played you real hard he doesnt even text you for like one week ? Without no reason at all . Who do he think he is some sort of royal blood ? Oh come on gimme a break . A guy like that doesnt even know how lucky he is just to have you . So think wisely make up your mind , is this the kind of guy you want to be with ? You still have a long journey ahead you'll meet some guys and eventually move on so dont worry . Whatever it is your decision I'll always be your back up dont hold your tears dont lie to me and dont ever tell me that you're okay when I know youre not I can see right through your eyes kay babe . You'll find happiness someday trust me just dont ever give up right now what you should do is clear up your mind stop texting him get some space and focus for next year our upcoming SPM . Its not the right time to think about some lamedude you deserve someone better in the future   I promise you this . Rmember what I said " If you arent being treated right by a guy , dont wait for him to change ".

Hey Assalamualaikum I guess i'm back peeps . So , I havent been writing for almost one week and I survived :') haha but actually I went to Addmaths camp cause I suck a lot in Maths well not that bad actually but real bad though I used to love maths when I was little and until now but somehow it turns out bad Idk why Geeshhh get it ? peaceyo . The camp was held for 4 days since 3rd December to 6 at UniKl , Pasir Gudang so yeah it was awsome and farrrr farrrr away beyond my expectation . The facilitators there were so damn nice and heck yeahh annoying much like seriously they even compared us girls to guys like a lot everyyy singleee timee *tearsofannoying-ness* lemme give you an example : Budakk lelaki makan sendawa , budak perempuan ? jadi ular sawa HAHA --' next Budak perempuan ni poyo lahh tau tak poyo tu ape ? bukan cantik tapi pondan yang original err -,-  Lelaki sangat baik malam malam nanti buat qiamullail tak mcm perempuan , malam jeh tukar jadi segala P you know all hantu starts with capital P like ponti , pocong , penanggal and so much more . Haha I laughed a lot there and it was fun no doubt except the double face facilitators :P Me and my girls suka gila menganjing ayat feci like this ----> Sukahati sayalah , tah pape jeh perempuan ni and etc . LOL much and the last day there was the funniest happiest and bedekakness with my girls :') we laughed a lot , we stalked the guys mostly ex-classmates from their dorm actually not like stalked stalk we just you know scared them and stuff HAHA sorry guys and we wanted to hang a long upstairs to the wide open balcony eating junkiess and having girls talk but ade mama guard which I acted like an idiot by running I was owned BIG TIME BRO and aten pah ida were following me with their towels and pretended like we actually wanna take our bath like 1 a.m. in the morning but sadly we cant find the stairs haha pity us :/ ? FTW we are awsome KUTU'S haha happymoments :') My girls we slept at 3 a.m during the last day we did yoga we danced in the room we lay in our bed taking pictures nd stuffs I was actually happy and I realized they're my family no matter what happened I will always love them and my babies yg tak pergi its okay we'll have a great time together all of us kay so no worries I missed you . Cheers to Addmaths which is gonna be easy I think I hope so Ameen and to my whole new life ahead of me without anyone ruining it :') may Allah bless them in whatever they're doing right now . Lots of love , LOL 

M , 

The Lovely Kutu Girl Group