It has been ages and a really really really long time since I log in to blogger . Swear to God I miss everything . I missed the moments when I really loved writing . The times when I dont even have to think to write about everything that's happening around me nor the times I spent with my loved ones . Something inside just fade . I know I shouldnt say this cause I should be greatful for what ever happens in life and I'm happy the way it is . Guess there's just a part of me telling myself I should stop . Stop thinking . Stop having this playback memory that kills me inside whenever I rewind . Stop overthinking . Stop imagining . Stop thinking what if's . Stop and stop and stop . Someone please create a time machine I beg you . Maybe I just miss the days or am I the only one #sigh
I love to bottle everything up to myself and pray that someone someday will just break my secrets inside by looking at me . Till the day I meet someone like that I'm gonna keep it to myself because sometimes there's just stuff better left unspoken . I hate explaining things . I hate answering . And that's me . No matter how much I want to pour out everything inside my heart about all the things I'm going through , all the struggles I'm handling , all the criticism , all the ifs and wishes that's going through my brain , I just stop and I realized something , realized that rather than sharing my thoughts I should just refrain myself from doing so . That feeling that effing insecure feeling that I have , I couldnt handle that . I'm just afraid I think , afraid of what others may think .
Those day where I end up crying because I feel like I couldnt turn to anybody and those times where I choose not to depend on anybody else , I actually learn something from it ; I've learn to be independent .
a girl , virgo , 95's and Proud
M
